FO: Pintesting

Too busy to blog!
Knitting like crazy!
Learning to arm-knit?!
Pintester Movement 2.0!

I read the sometimes-NSFW, always-hilarious Pintester blog, in which Pinterest pins are tested out by intrepid reporter/guinea pig Sonja Foust... and she recently issued a challenge: retest a pin idea that she's already tried and see what happens!  How could I resist?
p.s. Mama, NSFW in this case means there's swearing.  You have been warned.

One of my favorite -ahem- failures (sorry, Sonja) was an attempt at arm knitting; the FO image was pinned from designer Simply Maggie's video tutorial, and I was able to find it as a free! Ravelry pattern as well.  The Pintester did not fare so well (spoiler alert?), but I hoped that my base knowledge of with-pointy-sticks knitting would give me some sort of advantage... and I had a cunning three-step plan!

Step 1: use the correct yarn for the job!
Step 2: easily grasp the mechanics of arm knitting!
Step 3: bask in glory!

Visiting stash... ooh, Step 1: complete!

Debbie Bliss Cashmerino Superchunky -- it's discontinued

The tutorial/pattern calls for super bulky yarn held double and I just so happened to have this merino blend hanging around, doing nothin since 2006.  Perfect for the project and stash-busting at the same time...

That sound you hear is me polishing my nails on my shoulder.
Like a boss.

Step 2: um.  Okay.  Let's present this as a series of vignettes.

Long tail cast on: success?  I guess?  looks a mess.  Bless.

Attempt One: in which I leave way too much slack and have no clue how to properly twist the yarn to approximate stockinette stitch.

Nope.

Attempt Two: in which my husband hovers over me and tells me that I look like I'm in "yarn handcuffs."

He's not wrong.

Attempt Three: in which my daughter distracts me so much, I drop a selvedge stitch and don't realize it until it's too late.  Fillagadusha.

Here's what I learned about arm knitting:
Everyone else in the house needs to leave me alone.
Also, I need at least three days to procrastinate.

Step 3: I am a supermodel!

Eat your heart out, RuPaul!

In the end, Attempt Four was a winner, with a cast-on edge of seven and a total length of six feet (ends sewn together).  With prior practice and without distractions, I was finally able to finish this in the promised half-hour time frame.

bind-off edge of glory

double-looped for cowl realness

Thanks for the challenge, Madame Pintester!  I don't know if I'd ever try this again, but I was able to go from yarn to finished object fairly quickly and for cheap-as-free, which counts as a win in my book.  Plus I earned points in the Harry Potter Knit & Crochet House Cup! 

...I've said too much.  Gotta go!  Evenstar beading awaits!